How to go about getting my friend a girl.

[Fozy]

Dude's 25. He's fat as shit. Confidence down the drain... conversation of that of Tamer.

 

Me and a friend have been attempting to get my friend a girl, or at least laid. We've attempted going out and getting girls to come and talk to us, and then attempting some pushing into some conversation... never works. He clams up and well, the girls love it, obviously.

 

We've devised a plan, but any tips would be cool.

 

So, the dude used to work in a bar, but chucked it, for no reason, and now is just happy to get his funds from the government, and spend it all on alcohol while he lives with his gran.

 

Plan: He's been accepted into college for music production - don't ask how, we don't know either. With this he should have some sort of money to play with.

 

We're going to tell him we're planning to have a night out soon, and we're going to look sharp as fuck. This is primarily to get him to buy clothes that look good on him, as he is usually just wearing baggy long shorts and a tap out t-shirt. Swooon. Hopefully, we'll get him a nice outfit, smart trousers, a shirt and maybe even a nice thin black tie, or something? The world is his oyster, or at least, I hope it is.

 

He's pretty big, but I'm not sure how big. We're assuming XXXL size. We're not sure where he can get suit-like apparel that will fit him, at least that doesn't cost a fortune. Any ideas?

 

After that, we're planning to either take him out during freshers week for College/Uni. If not, early October as he'll have money for college then. Take him out during the week, perhaps a Thursday. Not too many people out which means the more people who are out, the more likely/desperate they are. I know, I sound like a dick but hey, it's true.

 

Go out, talk to every girl possible and introduce him to them all. Hopefully after a while, and a fuckload of alcohol - he takes a long time to get drunk - he will start coming out of his shell and show some real charisma. 

 

This is a serious undertaking, we've been talking about getting him a girl for a long, long time. Dude is just fucking hard to work with. I just don't think it'll be enough to get anything done. We need to build his confidence, we need to get him to look the part, we need to get girls interested! We've even contemplated getting him a hooker, but fuck knows where and how we go about this or even the costs, and even if it did happen, we doubt he'd go through with it.

 

Any ideas? 

 

Also, what's a good way to get a lazy fatty to lose some weight? Me and my friend are active as hell, but he's just not cut out for it. Gym doesn't seem like a good method, perhaps trying to get him to be more active as in going long walks, etc. I dunno.

 

Help.

[Fozy]

There's more to losing weight than that, you useless asshole!!!

[Tamer™]

Cheers for the mention.

[Fozy]

I dunno what he eats, but it must be garbage. He never drinks water, for example. We were out on a really hot day a while ago, for a long walk to get active. Me and my friend bought 2 bottles of water each and he got two bottles of irn-bru. Rolling eyes material.

[Guest Dazman™]

He just needs to BOlieve.

[Nate]

Before this thread turns into sex and relationship advice from people who haven't had sex or a relationship I'll start.

 

Online dating is laughed at, but it can be pretty effective if you know how to work them. A couple mates of mine got on as a joke around 2 years ago and now they've been in a healthy relationship since so it has to be somewhat effective. If your friend is confident enough in his skin then I'd suggest at least giving this stuff a try, I never dipped my feet in it so I'm just talking from an outside perspective I suppose. Also get him to start drinking water. That's like one of the most important things in a diet. I, myself started a diet about a year ago not to lose weight per se but more to feel healthy. It's not even that restrictive, and good diets aren't but for someone overweight they could sound like a serious burden. I'd say getting him confident is quite a bit more important then looks themselves as if he doesn't feel confident then he will never find a date. He needs to get into a gym, though. Gyms sound like the worst thing ever for the lazy but they aren't to bard after a week or two. It just becomes second nature to go down to the gym. 

[fufu ÷]

Not joking here, but get him some MDMA and take him to a rave. Easiest place and mindset to pull and meet people. Even if he hates the music, the mandy will fix that.

[SassySlothh]

i volunteer Aisha

[Tamer™]

My older brother goes to raves.

[Fozy]

 

i volunteer Aisha

I'll take you both

-

It won't work if he doesn't lose weight imo

 

 

Not all fat people are lonely, though. Obviously we're going to attempt to get him to lose weight, but that is a long term goal.

[Fozy]

 

 

 

i volunteer Aisha

I'll take you both

-

It won't work if he doesn't lose weight imo

 

 

Not all fat people are lonely, though. Obviously we're going to attempt to get him to lose weight, but that is a long term goal.

 

 

Thats true but losing weight will make him look/feel better so his confidence will go up.

 

Yeah, but as I said, long term goal. I'm more of the mindset of getting him dressing well is an awesome first step. I know I feel confident as hell when I'm suited up.

[BrotchMrToast]

It's pretty sure that getting a lazy fatty (I'm sure he's a great friend, though) a girl IS a long term goal. So, there's that.

Besides, how about letting him speak in front of a ton of people to start building his confidence?

Edited July 22, 2014 by BrotchMrToast®

[Tamer™]

So he just doesn't give a shit about anything? Make him realise how much he wants to be the guy you're trying to transform him into, that'll motivate him at least so he's easier to work with, don't eat fatty foods around him either.

[Fozy]

It's pretty sure that getting a lazy fatty (I'm sure he's a great friend, though) a girl IS a long term goal. So, there's that.

Besides, how about letting him speak in front of a ton of people to start building his confidence?

It's been a long-term goal, over a year since we've started talking about this.

[Fozy]

Also, for what it's worth, Tamer; I can't see your posts so I don't know what you're saying.

[Fozy]

As you should, I feel like he wears like Gears Of War T shirts or something & thats a no-no.

It's more of a big white tap out shirt. Dude just doesn't really care, just an attempt to do something or he's just gonna get bigger and lazier and spiraling downwards.

[BrotchMrToast]

Also, for what it's worth, Tamer; I can't see your posts so I don't know what you're saying.

Gotta love that Smiley

[fufu ÷]

Is he choosey about girls?

[Fozy]

Is he choosey about girls?

Yeah, he is, but he's also pretty... childish in the way he talks about them? He obviously wants a 5'6 model, but hey don't we all. He needs to come to grips that he needs to lower his standards, but it's far from that. He doesn't talk to girls, and whenever we talk about girls, he just seems... disinterested, if you know what I mean? I don't know if it's him just been so far gone from the thought of getting a girl he's just stopped caring, but if I was in his shoes, I'd be trying to feel butts when I walk past them big booty hoes, right guys?!

[BrotchMrToast]

I'm saying this in a completely non-offensive way; Are you sure he's not gay or a-sexual?

[Fozy]

I doubt he's gay, but asexual has been a thought of mine. Really, I just don't think he's had much experience with girls at all to really form much of an opinion of how to react, you know? That's what I mean by the child-likeness.

[fufu ÷]

 

Is he choosey about girls?

Yeah, he is, but he's also pretty... childish in the way he talks about them? He obviously wants a 5'6 model, but hey don't we all. He needs to come to grips that he needs to lower his standards, but it's far from that. He doesn't talk to girls, and whenever we talk about girls, he just seems... disinterested, if you know what I mean? I don't know if it's him just been so far gone from the thought of getting a girl he's just stopped caring, but if I was in his shoes, I'd be trying to feel butts when I walk past them big booty hoes, right guys?!

 

I think I know about the not caring. I stopped actively going after girls for a year or two a few years back, and when others talked about them at that time it becomes harder to join in as you can't relate to the topic in the same way. I'm guessing for him it's easier to just shut it all out rather than admit he's out of his depth and needs the help. Sometimes you just need to swallow the pride and mount a fatty.

[Fozy]

Fat girls can get any guy, fat guys can't get a look in.

[BrotchMrToast]

I doubt he's gay, but asexual has been a thought of mine. Really, I just don't think he's had much experience with girls at all to really form much of an opinion of how to react, you know? That's what I mean by the child-likeness.

Perhaps he's aware of his current situation (the fact that he's fat and has no confidence) and doesn't even try to go after girls, since he thinks that they would ignore him either way?

[Big Pete®]

Is he choosey about girls?

Yeah, he is, but he's also pretty... childish in the way he talks about them? He obviously wants a 5'6 model, but hey don't we all. He needs to come to grips that he needs to lower his standards, but it's far from that. He doesn't talk to girls, and whenever we talk about girls, he just seems... disinterested, if you know what I mean? I don't know if it's him just been so far gone from the thought of getting a girl he's just stopped caring, but if I was in his shoes, I'd be trying to feel butts when I walk past them big booty hoes, right guys?!

I think I know about the not caring. I stopped actively going after girls for a year or two a few years back, and when others talked about them at that time it becomes harder to join in as you can't relate to the topic in the same way. I'm guessing for him it's easier to just shut it all out rather than admit he's out of his depth and needs the help. Sometimes you just need to swallow the pride and mount a fatty.

Anyone who say's they haven't been in this scenario is lying!