Morphine, orgasms and Coke

[Chillalex]

a tale by me aged twenty and three quarters

Firstly yes this is a post purely to enlarge my e-penos. Fear it. I cant talk to my friends about any of this because of various reasons.

My saturday was fun, and I now class it as the day I became a man; more of a man than I was already, which to be honest, was pretty manly.

I awoke at 12, promptly, and the lady had returned home for the day and had stolen me two things of interest. The first, Pirates of The Caribbean 2, upon thy DVD. Fair enough, i thought, but a dvd isnt going to fellate me is it? But then a second thing comes out of her pocket and my morning wood quickly raises to status of babys arm - she has finally brought me a vial of morphine that they just sort of had at her house.

Score. I have been moaning about getting morphine for the longest time, and now, she finally provides; its going to be a good night tonight. Tonight, meaning, yesterday, in past tense.

The day passes and its all fair enough; i do work, i eat, blah. Its pretty much the end of term right now, and while my balls are to the wall with a deadline - still - im insistent that tonight, I celebrate the end, and go to my mates house to play Dead Rising, Gears of War and other shat, while getting tore up.

I have a bottle of vodka left over from friday, so I decide ill drink that, with two bottles of red rooster and whatever else the lady is bringing along.

So we get to the house, everythings good, and I roll up having swigged half a bottle of Chardonnay (I dont think it makes me gay.) I continue drinking and then I decide its Mighty morphine time! I take it, kick it back and chillax as only i know how; drinking vodka and chilling with video games

Well the night progresses and im feelin chilled, and I ask my mate if she can get me some coke, because ive never done it before and what the hell, I may as well.

She nips out for 2 hours and returns, we do a few lines and oooh its shit. No great experience but so far tonight ive tried morphine and coke. Told you i was hardcoar. I was also told that the morphine is actually pretty much heroin - the one drug ive never wanted to try.

I round the night off with a 40 minute walk home smoking some weed my mate had left over. Coke, Morphine and weed all in a night. Im suprised I didnt vomit.

I get home and I sleep in her bed because, well, mine has no sheets. Its a matress and duvet, im doing the washing, ok? And well i spend a while coming down... quite a bit. for quite a while. All thats going through my head at this moment is trying not to black out when all of a sudden she pipes up, out of the blue - "its the time of the month."

Stunned silence from me. Its quite presumptious of her im going to do anything, let alone go down (jitz is right. or whoever was, who said, that if you do it too often they start to EXPECT it.) I reply with, "why do i need to know that?" and get a "incase you were going to go somewhere below"... Yeah bollocks was I.

She can get that thought out of her head right now. Last time my neck hurt for two days because i swear shes not content with one orgasm but it has to be many. Cow. But this is another story; theres too much cunnilingus discussion on this board as it is.

So then it all carries on and id noticed something. Im kissing her neck, as thats part of the stock routine I have; I dont care much for it but they seem to enjoy it whoever they are, and I notice that they sometimes moan. So i experiment with this idea for a while and bam, I manage to make her orgasm without ever touching her downstairs, and its at this moment i feel slightly cheated for two reasons.

One, all this time and I never even had to go down there anyways

Two, I didnt get SHIT all.

I had the last laugh, however, when I let her fall asleep around 8 and then snuck out the room and came home on the train, like the craftiest mother fucker that ever existed. It does mean i nearly vomited on the train and ive actually been up 24 hours and still have work to do, but yea

Cliff notes then

I drink alot

I take morphine

I follow morphine up with cocaine

I then smoke some weed on the way home

I create orgasm without touching no no area, which i should mention was also a first for me.

So a night of firsts there.

And yeah, basically this post is how great my life is, and how many drugs i can take in a night, and how my sex life is actually decent.

Go ahead internet cynics, create a snide remark!

[Legendeath]

When I first saw this I thought it was the spam bot.

[Chillalex]

YOUR POSTING PRIVELAGES ARE NOW DENIED

[jitz]

Yeah when I saw it on the main page I thought it was a spam bot.

Unfortunately you haven't left yourself open to any jokes, atleast any humourous ones that I can think of.

All that's left to do is line yourself up with Kate Moss.

[scoot]

how was the morphine?

[Thom]

How did you take the morphine, tell me you didn't inject.

And you're WRONG, Underhill, cocaine is the best thing in the world. Why didn't you like it?

[Big Bizang]

It's rare that one enjoys cocaine on their first try.

[Thom]

I didn't think I liked it the first time I tried it, but that's because I was 16, and had infact been tricked into snorting ketamin. Understandable really. But first time I tried actual coke I loved it.

[Chillalex]

How did you take the morphine, tell me you didn't inject.

And you're WRONG, Underhill, cocaine is the best thing in the world. Why didn't you like it?

Oral dose, I cannot stand injections or needles at all, its part of my whole thing against it anyway. So when I found out it was just an oral dose, well... I didnt think it was bad.

It wasnt that great. I didnt notice much, but apparently my heart slowed down a lot and my pupils dilated. Cant remember much of an actual effect mind.

I didnt like it just because there was no real affect. I dont think I disliked it, and it certainly wasnt the snorting that bothered me considering the amount of crap ive stuck up my nose for a laugh. It just didnt live up to my lofty opinion of it i spose.

Wish i hadnt drunk so much just because Im not sure whats having an effect right now, the alcohol or god knows what.

Edit: yeah though i feel quite shit because I think a few of my friends think quite a lot less of me now, mainly for the morphine.

Edited March 4, 2007 by Chillalex

[Nemo]

heroin and morphine arent really the same, granted heroin is a lot stronger than its medical counterpart.

so yeah, i suppose you could feel less bad about that.

[Chillalex]

Yeah. The relation between the two makes me feel shit to be honest though, not so much the strength.

But yeah it does feel better knowing that it isnt as strong and at least mine was sourced clean

[crunk]

she has finally brought me a vial of morphine that they just sort of had at her house.

real clean.

[Chillalex]

oh yeah, im sorry, did you know where they got it from and how well its been kept too? In that case, we must all get together some time!

[CanaMatt]

they kept shooting me up with morphine when I was in the hospital with my kidney stone. I found it rather intense.